We’ll be celebrating our 10th year anniversary this year and I’m feeling thankful for the journey that we’ve made thus far.
Still, there is room for us to grow and become better life partners to each other. And we’re constantly trying to think of ways to keep the flame burning.
Sometimes we tend to overlook the small daily habits, but apparently…we shouldn’t. As the Gottman Institute says, “It’s the seemingly meaningless little moments of connection that are the most meaningful of all.”
Here are some daily habits that we can cultivate at home (listed according to the 5 love languages):
Words of affirmation
1. Say “thank you” when she cooks a nice meal
2. Say “thank you” when the other takes over the kids
3. Say “thank you” when the other has done something for you
4. Express words of affection, e.g., that she’s beautiful, gentle, or understanding. (Likewise for him, tell him he’s loving, kind, or hardworking.)
5. Listen with curiosity and seek to understand first before responding
6. Express support when you know she’s been having a rough time at work. (Likewise for the ladies too.)
7. Sneak a love note into her handbag (or use the note to wrap a chocolate bar and hide it in her handbag.)
8. Compliment her on a new dress or hairstyle
9. Make a gratitude list for each other, and take turns to read it out one date night.
10. Send her a sweet WhatsApp message out of the blue
Acts of service
11. Do the laundry, sometimes
12. Wipe the dishes she’s washed
13. Play chef for the night
14. Wash the car without her asking
15. Throw the trash at night
16. Top up the fuel when it’s low
17. Offer to ferry the kids to enrichment classes and let her sleep in on the weekends
18. Carry her heavy bags
19. Inform her early if you’re not having dinner at home
20. Check with each other before making a major decision
21. Make an effort to protect family time and prioritise it above other commitments
22. Ask her how you can help out more at home
23. Surprise her with flowers for no reason
24. Pick out a handbag/jewellery for an occasion
25. Plan a romantic getaway/staycation just for the both of you.
26. Hug often, before you leave for work/after you return
27. Hold her hand when you’re out on dates/shopping
28. Give her a kiss the moment you step in the door (John Gottman even suggests doing a 6-second kiss every single day!)
29. Lead her across the road or at crowded places
30. Diffuse some essential oils, turn down the lights, and give him a massage.
31. Spend time exercising together
32. Go for a walk in the park
33. Learn something new together
34. Check out a new cafe or restaurant together
35. Catch up (even if just for a few minutes) at the end of a long day
36. Pray for each other often
37. Plan a surprise date and pick her up after work.
38. Put your phone on airplane mode during your weekly or monthly date night
As part of my focus to be faithful in the small things, I hope to cultivate more of these little habits of love at home.
What would you add to this list? What are your favourite ways to show and receive love?