I’ve been talking about self-care lately, and one of the things on my heart is to really invest time and energy into my marriage.
What’s marriage got to do with self-care? Well, a woman’s heart is all about relationships, and the marriage relationship is a key one to nurture. It’s always easy to lose track, to be caught up with our work or family obligations, or just busy giving face-time to our gadgets and screens rather than each other.
So here are 3 of our favourite activities that I’ve found helps to set the mood for reconnection to happen. (The best part? You don’t need to spend a bomb on anything.)
1. Couple mask night
Ahem, confession time. The hubby and I enjoy putting on masks together. It’s silly I know, but also very therapeutic.
We haven’t been able to do it as regularly as we like to, and only recently got started on it again. During the half hour or so, we just lie in bed with our masks on, and talk and talk and talk.
If you’ve never tried it, you might want to give it a go. it’s a great opportunity to reconnect (maybe cos we’re just stuck with each other for an entire 30 minutes) amidst all the busyness.
And for us ladies, we also get to moisturise the skin at the same time. So win-win.
2. Go on a jog-date
I’m not a running type of person but I can manage a jog-walk. The hubby is gracious enough to slow down to my humble pace and just enjoy the evening air and scenery as we jog down the park. We talk about anything and everything, mostly about his work, and also the kids. Sometimes I share my worries and sometimes about my dreams.
Something about the air and the adrenaline helps to get blood pumping into my brain and I always feel a sense of clarity after the exercise.
I never thought I’d manage (much less enjoy) talking while running but I’ve managed to surprise myself. At the end of the run, we reward ourselves with some yummy hawker favourites like prawn noodles and bbq chicken wings. Or pig out on pizza from an Italian joint nearby.
It always feels good to work out together, so I hope to keep this up regularly (that means 2-3 times a month).
3. Have a device-free night
I must admit there’s always some inertia and even sweaty palms whenever I plan for this. I worry about what if I miss out on some major news break in the world, or on some important message from my Whatsapp / Facebook chat threads. (Yes, the gadget lifestyle has made us all a little paranoid about our social worlds. This has also made me realise how much a victim of “the urgent” I have become.)
The last weekend, I tried to have a device-free night (meaning mobile phone, laptop, and ipad are all switched off or on airplane mode from 7-12 midnight), but the hubby unfortunately had to get some work done, so we had to postpone it.
I think for such a night to be counted as fruitful and restful, it should feature some fun – maybe a movie or cooking something together, some sharing or planning (thinking about the future), and some quiet reflection (reading a book or the bible, and then sharing what you learnt).
So this is still on my list, and I plan to do it at least once a month.
I guess what you guys do doesn’t matter as much as how you intentionally set aside time and space to connect with your spouse.
Now it’s your turn…What’s your favourite way to reconnect?